Reality Check: Where is the difference between porn and sex? Published on:

03/24/2018
In the past it was a total taboo, today it’s an unspoken matter of fact: Porn reigns the internet. Approximately 30 percent of all websites contain pornographic content. But is that real sex? We do a Reality Check:

“How does sex look like?”

Somewhen most teenagers ask themselves questions like: “How does sex look like?” And so they search for the answer on porn-websites. Mostly friends show them these websites, because they find it somehow funny or interesting. I’ve seen my first porn-movie at a 14th birthday of a buddy, it was half past eleven. We were nothing else, but little boys in puberty, that giggled about everything belonging to girls or women. Suddenly one of the boys opened up a porn-website.

Bare facts

“Wooooooooooooow”, we thought. “All we see is naked women, that’s great!”. However, we had no idea what that actually means – sex. And we had no idea what we just saw. Because in a porno, nothing is as it seems. Behind the sex-loving women you see on screen, there are often impoverished, drug-addicted or drunk girls, that sometimes even get forced to do porn.

Some of the actresses, the so called amateurs, don’t do the job full-time. They just get caught on camera while having sex and maybe get a little bit of money for that.The hosts of these websites often earn a lot of money with these practices. And the actresses mostly are students who just try to earn some money to make a living. But the internet never forgets. Anything that is online once will stay there forever and most of these girls don’t reconsider the consequences of their actions.

Is that really sex?

When you as a 13-year-old teenager see a naked woman for the first time, you can be really surprised.  In puberty, it’s all about sex – and the other sex. At a certain point you know, what sex is and where the babies come from, but seeing all of this is something extremely different. And unfortunately, I have to disappoint you: Porn has almost nothing to do with real sex and neither with love. The industry doesn’t care about the actors, any kind of message or a connection to reality. The only aim is to look good in front of the camera and to show the viewers, what they want to see. But that’s not real.

Where are the differences?

Real sex is not just about sexual satisfaction, but about love, affection and tenderness. Many porns are the exact opposite of that. In addition, the women are shown as horny sex-dolls, who won’t ever reject. That’s also not real. Sex is all about communication: You talk about preferences and wishes with your partner and try to find a pleasant way for the both of you.

Is it all so bad?

No, it’s not all black or white. Of course there are some bad examples (and not too few in this business), that expose young women and exploit them for just a few dollars. But there are also porns, for example those of the german director Laura Méritt, which focus on showing real sex and self-determined women. They’re called “feminist-porns” and they aim to show reality. And if both of the actors know what they do and have a good communication and transparency, we just say:

 

Do what you want. Do it with love, respect and condoms.

 

Author: Maxi

Team Blog

Youth against AIDS

This post was written by Jugend gegen AIDS Blog

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